Bailey is mum to 11-month-old Brodie (pictured) and has two older sons aged 9 and 6.
Most rewarding part of motherhood?
Honestly everything! Watching my boys figure out who they are and discover what they love, hearing them describe things to me with so much passion and detail, helping them get through tricky situations and big emotions, knowing that I'm building a strong foundation for the future of our relationship. Being a boy mum is the greatest accomplishment of my life. The cuddles are pretty great too :)
What got you through the most difficult days?
My husband and my big boys, without a doubt! They put everything into perspective and bring me back to the present and out of my overthinking brain.
What did you do differently during postpartum or early motherhood 3rd time around?
I've always cherished the newborn bubble, and this time was even more special and sentimental for me knowing that we're done having babies. I don't know if I did anything differently other than just tried to be more relaxed and go with the flow, which is always easier said than done, especially with older kids, but I really tried to slow down and not rush through the days.
With 3 children, how do you make time for yourself?
Usually it's exercise, but lately this is something I'm not very good at - the Mum Guilt coupled with trying to do too many things at once and feeling like I'm failing at all of them gets me into trouble! I'll make that a goal for 2024 actually - more intentional time for myself.
Worst piece/s of unsolicited advice you should have ignored?
All of the "shoulds" were really unhelpful for my mental health, even when coming from professionals - he should be rolling / sleeping / eating solids / taking a bottle / self settling / crawling / standing / out of nappies etc etc. If I've learned one thing in nearly 10 years of motherhood it's that kids will do things on their own time, no matter how hard we try to make skills or milestones happen sooner or later. Comparison is always the thief of joy!
How did you go about building your circle of support in early motherhood away from family and friends?
I had to be brave and get wayyyy outside of my comfort zone, I completely leaned into the Mother's Group experience and just said yes to things I was invited to go to (playdates, activities, meetups, etc) even if it felt too hard or too awkward at the time. I also took a job working in a retail shop when my son was one to give myself a chance for some adult interaction, a creative outlet and to connect with people in a way that was about me and not my baby. It was the best thing I could have done for myself at the time.
I moved to Australia when I was a 29-year-old newlywed and my husband started work straight away... so I was here with no family, no friends, no job and no kids. It was truly starting a new life and at an age where it's really hard to make new friends, it was definitely a challenge. I think the excitement of living here kind of shielded me from any loneliness for quite a long time though, and then having my first son a year later threw me into mum life which is where mother's group was so important for me. I'm still close with 3 of the girls and some of our kids are in school together which is really special.
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Beyond the Birth gives women the opportunity to share their postpartum experience to help other women going through the same life stage, because when we support other mothers by telling our story it makes the journey a little less hard and a little less lonely.
