Yulia is mum to 5-month-old Evan and 4-year-old Alex.
How did your second postpartum compare to your first?
When approaching my second postpartum period, I was both better prepared and more go-with-the-flow. I put a lot less pressure on myself to 'get it right' and this extended to how I perceived any pressure from others too; nurses, midwives, grandparents. Everything was a lot more 'chill', and I was lucky to really revel in the experience, rather than feeling like I was hanging on for dear life. At the same, I found I had to dig deep to continue to be a present parent for my daughter while her whole world was changing too. That said, watching her grow exponentially in a matter of days and magically step into the role of 'big sister' was reward enough.
What is the biggest misconception about early motherhood?
I was led to believe that giving birth and early motherhood are the 'most natural things in the world' and that 'you will just know what to do'. In contrast, my experience with early parenting was all about trial and error, perseverance, and learning on the job. Of course, all this was while battling lack of sleep, recovering from a c-section, and confronting an overnight shift in identity. I woke up a high-achieving marketer heading to work and ended the day as almost a 'life-support system' for a tiny, wriggling miracle. It was the hardest, most incredible thing I have ever done and I am a much, much better person for it.
How did you seek out support and connection from others?
We moved to a new suburb shortly after the birth of our second so I requested a mothers' group from the council. I have been extremely fortunate to be introduced to a group of women with whom I had so much in common. Professional services (such as lactation consultants, sleep consultants, etc) were harder to find, and I relied heavily on the recommendations from other parents and our GP. I am eager for From Day One to officially open its doors to make this process a whole lot easier.
Any advice for first-time mothers or those about to head into postpartum?
There is no such thing as perfection. Good enough is SO amazing, and the fact that you're worrying as much as you are, means that your child is so loved and so cared for, and in the best hands they could ask for. You will get some things wrong, but in the long run, likely, they will not matter at all. You're doing an incredible job! You are your baby's whole world, so take care of yourself - if not for you, for them.
What does self-care look like for you?
In those first days, self-care was as simple as taking a hot shower without feeling rushed. Once I felt ready to leave the newborn cocoon, seeking the company from women who 'just get it' was an incredible support and these friendships remain one of the biggest perks of motherhood.
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Beyond the Birth gives women the opportunity to share their postpartum experience to help other women going through the same life stage, because when we support other mothers by telling our story it makes the journey a little less hard and a little less lonely.
